Mommy time-out

I don't want to scream at my kids, well I do want to sometimes - but that is not the parent I want to be. I am finding that more and more over the last few weeks - my patience is wearing thinner, and my frustration point is coming much quicker.

I have an almost six month old - who still isn't sleeping well at night, a two year old who has decided that she needs to be in physical contact with her mommy 24/7. She is now waking up screaming at night for hugs and cuddles, demanding that I not hold the baby and does not want to leave mommy's side. In fact she screamed on the kitchen floor the other night for an hour while I made supper - because I could not hold her hand while making pizza. I tried all of the techniques that I draw upon, I offered to let her help me, I took 5 minutes to sit with her and cuddle before going back to the pizza, I offered daddy as a cuddle substitute, I tried to distract her with music to dance as I cut the veggies...there was no success - so she wailed on the cold ceramic kitchen floor.

Which got me thinking about time-outs, mommy time-outs to be specific. For a child the recommendation is that they take a minute for each year of their age to be still, think about what they did wrong and give themselves a chance to retrieve their sense of inner calm. So my daughter gets two minutes in front of the basement door. Then we talk about what went wrong, we hug and she says she is sorry (well actually lately she has been saying "No way, not sorry," but that is another post).

But, what about mommy time-outs. I can't take a minute for each year of my age, don't get me wrong, I would love to sit in front of the basement door for 30 minutes, reflecting, centering myself and trying to think about where I went wrong. I don't even balk at then hugging who I offended, most often the dictator herself, saying I am sorry, and telling her where I went wrong. But, 30 minutes - that is impossible, I can't even eat a piece of toast without holding one child, while the other is in all likelihood up in arms because they are not the one being held.

So do you shorten it to 1 second for each year of your age? Because if that is the case, I would like to age at least another 30 years pretty quickly. How does this work? Where is the manual, the book that tells you how mommy time-outs work? I need more than a deep breath, I could step outside and scream - which is what I would like to do, but I don't really want my neighbours to think I am crazy. I need to find my happy place, and it needs to be somewhere in the house and attainable with two children screaming - I am not sure where it is, and people keep swearing this gets easier, but I want a date. I want to circle it on the calender, and know - that I can hang in for however many more weeks, that when set period of time is over, I will be calmer and I will be able to be the parent I want to be, the parent that I want my children to know.

Maybe I should just take a red marker and circle a random date on the calender and convince myself that from that day forward it will be easier. Maybe I should choose today, to encircle and decide that from this day forward, I will find my ohm place and go to it, when all I really want to do is throw myself on the floor and have a tantrum with them. Or maybe, I will just throw myself on the floor and out tantrum my two year old.

Operation Big Girl - Phase Two

I have decided that it is time for Elise to start to potty train. A few months ago she was displaying all of the readiness signs. Dry diapers, she would let you know when she went to the bathroom, all of it. I didn't potty train her because I was too pregnant and I had heard so much about regressing and not taking on new things before siblings were born that I didn't capitalize on it.

Well, now she shows no interest, and I was waiting until she began to again. But yesterday I read a book that I took out from the library entitled Diaper Free before 3, it says that there is no need to wait for readiness signs. That before disposable diapers children used to potty train much earlier. So, I thought here goes nothing potty training is beginning.

Today I told her when she woke up that while we are awake and at home, there will be no diapers. And there haven't been. Though we have been through 8 pairs of underwear. The floor was peed on 6 times, the potty peed in once. The seventh dirty diaper was a poopy bum. Though she did tell me while she was pooping that she was, I just didn't get her to the potty in time. I am trying to tell myself to stay the course, it will only get easier.

I have decided that I need two more tools to continue to potty train. I need to get a potty that she can get on herself, I saw some second hand Baby Bjorn ones that I am going to invest in, and we need some more underwear. I think I will take her with me to pick out the big girl panties, she can choose what she wants and maybe it will provide some motivation for her!

Operation Big Girl - Phase 1

Well, we are now on night five of life without 'yuckie', and as I write I am cringing as my daughter screams out "hug, mommy, daddy, hug". It is breaking my heart.

The journey started after a nap on a Friday afternoon, when I explained to her that we were going to get her a special toy and once she had it she was going to throw away her 'yuckie'. She agreed and off we went to Build a Bear. She choose a bunny with a pink dress and had a great time making it. When we went up to the cash, I gave her the 'yuckie' in a plastic bag and told her that she was a big girl and we had to throw the 'yuckie' in the garbage and then we could take home her special new bunny. She did and we did.

Night one was a success, we only had about a half hour of complaining combined with some crying. Then she fell asleep until morning.

Day two was not quite the success that day one was. There was no nap - she cried for the two hours instead. She fell asleep relatively easily but cried again from 1 am to 3 am.

Day three, we were all in need of some sleep. We went to Nanny and Pappy's in the morning and Elise napped on the way home. That meant that night three went somewhat better than expected. And there was some complaining - but nothing like night two.

Day four she had a nap! She complained for about a half hour, but napped in her bed. However, night four was a different story and was written about above. She screamed and cried and if I had have had a 'yuckie' in the house I probably would have given it to her.

Day 5 - she cried herself to sleep at naptime - but it only took 20 minutes and bedtime was much the same.

Day 6 - that is today. She has been complaining for an hour now. I know she is exhausted but she just won't give in to it.

Cloth Diapers

Today is Graham's first day in cloth diapers, he looks too cute with his bright orange bum. We used them on Elise until I got pregnant again - and couldn't take the smell. I needed something I could just dump quickly - as I tend to get very nauseous while pregnant.

I have gotten all our old diapers ready to roll. But, felt that Graham needed a few diapers to call his own. Especially since we have a few pink and purple diapers that he will be wearing at bedtime! I went and checked out this new store in Bayer's Lake. It is called Bliss - and they sell both new and gently used cloth diapers. I was looking around and was very drawn to two size small fuzzi bunz diapers - one with trains on it and the other with jungle animals - too cute. And they only cost me $10 a piece. Can't wait to get these on his bum!